HomeSatireSincerity awards™ launched

Sincerity awards™ launched

The Annual Sincerity Awards™ (SA) have been announced amidst a frenzy of interest from establishment figures all around the globe.


Brainchild of Charles Foster Kane (or CFK) Chief Editor of The Globalist Gazette- The purpose of Sincerity Awards™ is to encourage and foster excellence in expressing Sincerity. “People just don’t appreciate how difficult it is to project deep conviction about an issue or person(s) whilst having zero interest in it, or knowledge of it, whatsoever; But without mastery of this sublime skill it would be impossible for the UN, WHO, or WEF etc. to implement their vision, as the public would not have bought in.“ It’s a challenge that every politician, CEO, media jockey, actor, artist and public figure struggles with daily, and it’s not recognised enough in Elite society. It is hoped that these awards will create much-needed interest in this woefully neglected area of endeavour.

“People just don’t appreciate how difficult it is to project deep conviction about an issue or person(s) whilst having zero interest in it, or knowledge of it, whatsoever.”

The Globalist Gazette Board asked Tony Blair to host the Sincerity Awards™ scheduled for Halloween 2024 but Blair refused because, as he said, he didn’t want to rule himself out of the competition. Whilst the Board were enthused to find he was interested in the competition, it left us at a loss as to whom else to ask. We needed somebody completely devoid of introspection or moral compass. As we sat around in the boardroom scratching our heads, CFK quipped with a wry smile “It would be ironic indeed to have a half hearted host present the Sincerity Awards™.” But as we sat there, one answer occurred spontaneously to us all- the task must surely fall to the well known all-rounder performance artist known as Bono™. “Simply put no-one who can compete with Paul Hewson in terms of sheer vacuous narcissistic malevolence, with an extraordinarily well-honed penchant for portraying the opposite.” said CFK.

U2’s new clown show entitled “Careful With That Baby” is currently in rehearsal.

Having discussed the idea briefly, The GG board swung immediately into action and contacted Bono’s new management agency Full Stop regarding his availability. Bono’s band U2 (minus their drummer) is currently playing shows inside a bubble in Las Vegas. “Hopefully we can persuade him out of his bubble for the occasion.” joked CFK to peals of haughty laughter.

If you’re looking for someone to come and talk at a crowd, Bono™ is available for hire.
The big bubble in Las Vegas inside which U2 are performing.

The Board produced it’s own shortlist of potential nominees as follows:

  • Justin Trudeau
  • Bill Clinton
  • Greta Thunberg
  • Cate Blanchett
  • Liam Neeson
  • Leonardo di Caprio
  • Micheál Martin

Note- Full Stop LLC are currently looking for a web designer to help finish their website which currently has zero functionality- Interested parties can contact them at:


Full Stop Management, LLC
1100 Glendon Avenue
Los Angeles, CA 90024
(310) 601-4100

We just couldn’t resist adding this gem.


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